I love what cheap massive storage will do for business, culture and research. Yet every so often I have second thoughts about how storage and other technologies might be misused – with the very best of intentions.

This isn’t a Left or Right issue: folks from both extremes think of “good” reasons to spy on Americans. With the combination of GPS automobile speed and location tracking, cell phone GPS, credit card transactions, personal RFID and cheap massive storage, a massive behavioral database on every citizen is just a few billion dollars away. (See MyLifeBits, NIMD, NSA and You.)

In just 10 years any American could receive a letter like this one:

Department of Family Security
Behavioral Analysis Division
Prediction and Notification Program
Washington, DC

April 1, 2016

Dear Mr Harris,

Pursuant to the provisions of the Defense of Family Act, the Super-PATRIOT Act, the Safe Driving Act, the American Family Self-Reliance Act and the Personal RFID Security Act, we are pleased to send you this Notice of Significant Family Behavior Change (NSFBC).

The NSFBC is designed to alert you to changes in the behavior of family members. You are asked to use this information for a caring discussion with the affected family member(s).

Family Member Relationship: Wife

Summary of Behavioral Change(s):

  • Financial:
    • 6 instances of afternoon drinks at the Black Rock Bar and Grill
  • Transportation:
    • 4 MPH Average Urban Speed Increase during afternoon drive times, resulting in $214 in Excess Speed Charges.
  • Communications:
    • Afternoon cell phones calls received at the Sleepy Bear Motel 1/22/16, 1/29/16, 2/04/16 and 2/11/16.
  • Association:
    • Mr. STEVEN D. CLARK, a tennis instructor at the Oak Valley Country Club, is the only individual whose financial, travel and communications patterns are known to match those of CHRISTINE FORD HARRIS at this time.
  • Terrorist Plot Threat Rating:
    • LOW.

DFS/BAD reminds you that this information only suggests significant behavioral change(s). You are encouraged to open a respectful dialogue with the family member(s) to understand the the reasons for change(s). Work-related behavior changes are common and no cause for alarm. Please remember that it is highly unlikely your wife is a terrorist.

Based on DFS statistical profiling a Notice of Potential Domestic Dispute has been filed with local law enforcement. A list of faith-based and secular counseling services has been attached for your convenience.

Our goal at the Department of Family Security is to help you build a strong family unit. For more information please see our website at DEFSEC.GOV.


(s)Elden Ebbish
Family Security Officer
“DFS – Helping Make America Strong – One Family At A Time”

IT is like any other technology: it can be used for good or ill. It is ironic that today the only thing standing between us and massive personal databases – besides the “quaint” U.S. Constitution – is the cost of Big Iron storage. Keep up the high prices, and preserve our liberty!